Kanky Clause
by Karel-kun
Summary: Kankuro is Santa Clause!....Well Kanky Clause....and he is delivering presents to everyone in the Naruto World....More to come in future chapters....
1. Ready Steady Go!

**Kanky Clause!**

It was a starry night on Christmas Eve in the Sand village, Kanky Clause was getting ready for take-off. Pure-white snow covered the small village, and YES it does snow here! Just because its a desert doesnt mean there's no snow!

"Hey….Kankuro….I don't think you're giving Shikamaru enough rocks…and you should check if you accidentally put some gems or something in there…." Gaara lectured Kankuro about…..giving people rocks…. Kankuro and Gaara were standing outside of their house, getting ready. Kankuro was wearing the usual jumpsuit, except this one was red and decorated with Christmas stuff...yes that's right, STUFF! DEAL WITH IT! Gaara was in Happy Bunny PJ's with bunny slippers on. He had a hood on, which was connected to his PJ's, that had bunny ears sticking out of it. The gentle winds blew eastward, where Kankuro was heading. Gaara's bunny ears were waving in the wind in a cute fashion.

"Don't worry, even if Shikamaru finds anything special, he'd give it to Temari, and we could just steal those from her."

"Ugh….whatever….just get out of here so I can sleep…" Gaara rubbed his eyes and folded his arms.He slowly took off his hood, causing the bunny ears to stop going WHOOSH, but his hair started going WHOOSH.

"You know, you've been sleeping too much ever since the Shukaku's been extracted….I don't think it's healthy…" Gaara leaned against the house.

"Ugh….Who cares what you think….wait….can you even think? Wow! That's incredible Kankuro! You actually thought!" Gaara replied to Kankuro's lecture with ignorance.

"Yeah, whatever, just don't tell Temari that I'm Kanky Clause…."

"You know you re--ly…are… a…re….zzzzzzzz…." Gaara fell asleep…right there…in a middle of a sentence…The loss of consciousness cause him to slowly fall into a sitting position, leaning on the wall.

"…heheheh…." Kankuro noticed that one of the reindeer….pooped…so he used chakra strings to carefully pick up the….poop…and place it right on Gaara's head. "Merry Christmas, Gaara!"

Kankuro climbed into the sleigh, sat on the rather hard seat…and formed strings of chakra to adhere to all the reindeer's harnesses.

"Yosh! Let's get started!"

**"Now Slasher! Now Cancer! Now, Sloth and Vixen!  
On, Cosmetic! On, Stupid! On, Dumber and Friction!"**

**End Chapter 1**

**This took me 30 minutes...and thanks to Jess and Cassie for inventing Kanky Clause! It took me a LONG time to think of names for the reindeer...Vixen is an offensive term...so I kept it like that. :) Cosmetic... that was the closest thing I could think of to Comet...I couldn't think of one for Prancer, so I looked Prancer up in the dictionary, and I used the word thats opposite of it... Next chapter coming soon, and they will be longer!**


	2. The Hyuugas

Chapter 2 

"Let's see nyah… I'll go to the Leaf village, give Naruto and everyone else their gifts….then back to the Sand village, and give Gaara and Temari their stuff…" Kankuro was soaring through the starry skies, delivering gifts to the nice peoples. Shikamaru and various others got rocks, because Kankuro hates Shikamaru for no apparent reason and he feels like giving people rocks.

"OI! Cosmetic! Stop being stupid, stop sleeping and get back to work!" Kankuro yelled at the innocent reindeer that felt like sleeping and making the sled move slower. Kankuro grabbed a random rock from the sack behind him which contained all of the people's presents….and ugly boulder rock things… He threw it at the poor reindeer, causing it to awake, go crazy, and do things….not going into much detail…  
"Aw! That's one less rock to give to Shikamaru!!! NOOO!!!! I hate you Cosmetic! HMPH!"  
Anyway, Kankuro soared over the Land of Fire, reaching the Leaf village. He decided to go to Neji's house first, then Hinata's. He found himself over the Hyuuga clan residence place…thing….whatever it is…He pulled the retarded reindeer to cease movement, and land on the Neji's shed that contained the mountain of lost plushies. (refer to the Adventures of Kankuro and Kiba, chapter 1 by Jesshiku-chan)  
"Oi….I remember this thing….I still want some of those plushies"  
Kanky Clause grabbed the sack of presents that contained REAL presents, jumped of the shed's roof, and walked toward the part of the Hyuuga clan residence place thing where Neji lived….or where he thought he lived…SAME THING!  
"ARGH! Where does that poohead live?!?! There should at least have nameplate things on these houses that say **NEJI HYUUGA'S HOUSE** like that one right there!" Kankuro stopped walking and stared at the house with the nameplate. "Umm…that's nice…" He left the sack behind, picked out Neji's particular gift, and carefully and silently walked towards the door. He cautiously opened the door…KABOM!….It creaked….causing a scared Kankuro to have shiver things down his throat…..and spine…and up his hair…and everywhere that's important…. It was completely dark inside Neji's house, but Kankuro could tell he was on carpet. He couldn't see Neji….or anyone. "Umm…..yeah…." He was scared, so he just left the present at the front door and walked out. The present was neatly wrapped in white paper and tied with a green ribbon. It was a perfect cube-like box. "And now for Hinata…hopefully she has a nicer house….yeah…but I'd rather not see…."

**Several Minutes Later**

"Gosh….FINALLY! I FOUND HINATA'S HOUSE! It's too much trouble to actually go inside the house….so…." Kankuro took a present out of the sack, it looked very similar to Neji's, but this one had purple paper with a pink ribbon. He slowly opened the door and threw the present inside….without even looking.

"EEEK!"

Kankuro swiftly ran out of the Hyuuga clan area….thing…

**Several Minutes Later**

"ARGH! How'd I find myself here?!?!?!…This sign says…. **Home to the Uchiha Clan**…Oh well…I'll leave off Sasuke's and Itachi's gifts…"

**Elsewhere….**

"Hiashi-sama, I spotted a burglar in my house, he did not take anything from me, so I did not attack. He may still be around the Hyuuga main houses. We should inform Hinata-sama and Hanabi-sama. He seems to have dropped this box…"

"….Peter Pan…."

"What?"

"Peter Pan! Didn't you ever watch that?!!? There's a bomb in that thing! See, you're supposed to put it to your ear and it goes KABOM!"

"Um….Hiashi-sama, are you feeling OK?"

"Just put it to your frickin ear, woman!"

"I'm a man….for your information…."

"PUT IT TO YOUR FRICKIN EAR WOMAN!!!….or….whatever YOU are…."

"Fine….but I don't see the use of putting this thing to my ear…" Neji put the mysterious box to his ear, and to his surprise, he heard a ticky noise thing….

"Oh my god! There really is a bomb in this thing!"

"That's what I told ya!" Hiashi stood up and pointed at the box with an unusual serious look in his eyes. "That thing must be disposed of right away!"

"Eh? Are you sure? I mean, it could just be a clock, you know."

" I said dispose of it right away!"

"Uh….yes sir…" Neji stood up, bowed, and walked out of the room, outside, and into his house. He turned the lights on, and pondered what to do. He put the box on a random table, pulled out a chair, and carefully unwrapped the box.

"…Wha?!"

**At Hiashi's….**

"Umm….Father….I found this…."

**Back to Kanky Clause**

"Gosh! someone could have at least given me a map…" Kankuro looked around, it was pitch black outside, but a long blanket of stars covered the sky. Kankuro looked at his watch.

"Oh, crud! It's already 2:13 a.m.! Hey…now that you think about it… Where are my reindeer?!"

**I hope this was longer...It took me a long time...very long time...I didn't want to put the whole trip in one chapter...or else it would be too long...so I'm seperating it into chapters by people...so...the Hyuugas were first! I'll reveal what everyone got at the end of the story...ok...hmm...yeah...SO REVIEW! Or I'll eat you...and being eaten isn't very pleasant...**


End file.
